Early this year I was caught driving in a rainstorm. I had a premonition, if such things exist, that it would be a doozy as the clouds rolled in. I’ve only seen clouds like that a few times in my nearly 40 years. (YIKES!) Why, you ask, did I go out if I knew a bad storm was on the way? It was time to pick my children up from school. And I thought I could beat it. Foolishness. I’ve driven for over 20 years, in a lot of bad weather. I mean, I live in Ohio! I got my learner’s permit (as it was called back in the day) in the middle of January and drove in snow in my first few weeks behind the wheel. Whatever was coming in that storm, I knew I could handle it. HA!
Never before have I experienced a torrential rain so heavy that it was literally blinding. As it first started to pour, I thought I should decrease my vehicle speed so as to see better and increase my wiper speed to move the water faster. Well, I did that, and it didn’t help much. So I slowed down even more. Now, keep in mind, this is a road I drive multiple times a day every day on the Mom Taxi service route. I know it WELL. You know the kind that you can drive in your sleep because it’s so familiar. But this day, the blinding rain was just that, blinding. I had literally no idea where I was on the road. I was waiting for a funnel cloud to descend at any moment and suck my van to the sky. I was shaking and terrified.
While I couldn’t see the road in front of me, I knew that to stop in the road would be equally dangerous, because anyone coming down the road behind me would not be able to see my white van. So I crept forward what felt like an inch at a time, looking for a place to pull off. Ahead loomed a shadow. Was it a barn or a tornado? I wasn’t sure, but I took a chance and pulled off, feeling certain I was driving straight into the ditch. Thank the Lord it was a driveway. I pulled closer to the shadow, a barn (not tornado!), and found the cover of some trees.
And I waited.
As the storm subsided and my shaking began to settle, I called my husband to let him know I was alright and to get back on the road. (And he told me about the baseball sized hail that had been falling at our house!) What an experience!
When I drive the road to school now, months after this experience, I can still remember it so clearly, and I still notice the barn that led me to the safety of a driveway in the blinding rain. But what struck me about this whole experience was the lesson on waiting. Sometimes, try as we may, we cannot see the way forward in life. We have the premonition that a bad storm of life is rolling our way, and before long, we can’t see straight through all the turmoil of that storm. Perhaps our circumstances are confusing, our emotions are blinding us, the choices are immobilizing.
As we considered cancer treatment options with my mom this summer, many of those factors – circumstances, emotions, choices – left us struggling to see the way forward. I loved my mom’s posture of faith: “I will wait until God shows me what to do. He has always been faithful. I know he will show me. Until then, I will wait.” Her faith has been an example to me, and because of her example I feel more confident when I choose to wait on the Lord instead of rushing ahead because I like action and forward movement.
Sometimes waiting out the storm of life – circumstances and emotions – is truly our best option. We can trust that God is still leading us even when we feel like we are blinded to the way forward. If we can’t see the next move (or the next inch of the road!) then perhaps the best choice is to simply wait, wait until he illuminates our next steps. Find a place of refuge, and simply wait on him.
For those of us who like action and forward motion, this can be difficult. But Scripture has many references to waiting on the Lord.
Psalm 27:14 says: “Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!”
Lamentations 3:25 says: “The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him.”
Psalm 130: 5-6 says: “I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I hope; my soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen for the morning, more than watchmen for the morning.”
Exodus 14:14 says: “The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”
Isaiah 64:4 says: “From of old no one has heard or perceived by the ear, no eye has seen a God besides you, who acts for those who wait for him.”
If you find yourself blinded to the way forward right now, take some time to wait on the Lord and trust that he will show you the way forward. He always has before. And when you feel his direction, step out in confidence and faith, knowing that you’re not leading from your own will, but you’re following the One on whom you waited patiently. And all these things said about Him in these verses above will be true in your circumstances: The Lord will be good to you. The Lord will fight for you. The Lord will act on your behalf. His Word will bring you hope. Your heart will find courage. It’s ok to wait until you hear from him.